Learning to look out for our self-care & mental health, Project Fearless style
Sharing thoughts, tips and tools this Mental Health Awareness Month
It’s so important to be kind to ourselves! (Image by Diana for PF)
Recently, our friends at Creative Jam Session got in touch to get our founder Mérida’s thoughts on this question:
Girls today are facing unprecedented levels of stress and pressure — to do well at school, to look and behave a certain way, and to measure up to expectations from friends, family, teachers and the media. Girls have shared that the combination of all these pressures can be unmanageable and is damaging their wellbeing. What advice can you give to young girls/women to practise self-care and look after their mental health?
We’re sure that the girls we exist to support will recognise lots of those feelings, situations and everyday pressures. At Project Fearless, we work hard to create spaces where we can bring each other up, and realise that we don’t need to reach impossible standards just to feel good about ourselves.
To create a world where girls truly feel empowered, strong, and valued for who and what they are, it’s so, so important that we learn to look after ourselves, and our day to day mental health, from a young age.
As this May is Mental Health Awareness Month, we wanted to share the full low-down on Mérida’s thoughts, tips and tools that she’s found helpful for finding a sense of belonging, being able to show up just as we are, managing the ups and downs in life, and setting healthy boundaries.
So here goes!
1. Find a group, crew or space that allows you to be you.
Find a space where you feel accepted, supported, heard, and celebrated.
Remember, you don’t have to be “the best version of you” all the time. A supportive space allows you to be your medium you, your worst you, and everything in between — and accepts you for just that.
Our skateboarding crew, just enjoying each other's company.
2. Celebrate your mistakes, stumbles, and learnings.
Be kind to yourself, and give yourself a break! Try to reframe how you look at mistakes: you’re only human, and humans mess up. Instead of looking at mistakes as failures, try to recognise that they are just bumps in the road (sometimes even funny ones!)
Every time you fall, you’re learning how to get right back up again and you’re building resilience 💪
3. Give yourself a high five.
We love to mix in journaling with our boxing sessions, so we can take some time to process everything we’re learning.
Yes, I know it feels weird, but you’re amazing, so tell yourself that! Being proud of yourself does not mean you are “selfish” or “self-centred”. It means you love yourself for all the amazing things you do.
Try choosing compliments that aren’t in any way related to your physical appearance (the society we live in means we can easily attach our self-worth to how we look, but we’re so much more than that).
For example:
💜 “I’m a good friend and teammate.”
💜 “I’m a great hype girl and I make others feel welcome.”
💜 “I like the way I’m resourceful and can always figure out a crafty solution.”
💜 “I’m proud that I tried that new skate trick, even though it was totally scary.”
You can do this in the mirror, in a journal, tell a friend, or direct message it to Project Fearless on social media. We LOVE celebrating you and, of course, we’ll keep it anonymous if you’d prefer that.
4. Get outside & get active.
Take a walk or find a new way to move your body every day. Or if you can’t get outside (aka Dutch weather), there are plenty of online yoga classes you can take for free via YouTube.
Yoga is a super simple way to connect with your breath and body. And when you do it from the comfort of your home, you don’t even have to feel self-conscious or think “Am I doing this right...?”
Believe me, I’m by no means a yoga expert, but when I do it at home I don’t care that I don’t have the “best position”. It’s still super nice to get grounded and practise stretching!
5. Start setting your emotional boundaries (and then celebrate when you’ve put them into action!)
Emotional boundaries are things I wished I learned about earlier, so I could’ve started practising them sooner. When your emotional boundary line is crossed, you often feel exhausted, scared, or too vulnerable. Putting up boundaries is important in protecting your mental and emotional self.
These might include:
💜 Saying no to something you don’t want to do
💜 Telling friends how their actions make you feel
💜 Checking in with yourself before saying “Yes!” to something
💜 Speaking up for yourself when something makes you feel uncomfortable
💜 Recognising that you don’t always need to be “on”, or reply to everything and everyone
6. Rewrite your Instagram algorithm.
Use that “Restrict” or “Unfollow” button! Are there certain accounts that make you feel “lesser”, or that you find yourself constantly comparing yourself to? These might even be some of your friends, but you can still restrict them from showing up on your feed, or unfollow them completely.
Have you ever noticed that when you search one thing on Instagram, or “Like” a video, suddenly your “Search” page starts only showing that? You can rewrite what Instagram shows you by liking and following people/accounts that bring you joy. Last summer, I rewrote my algorithm so now I just see skateboarders, cupcakes, and cats! Highly recommend it.
7. Do more things that bring you joy.
There is so much pressure to be “the best” at something that we often forget that most things in life are just for fun! So, what brings you joy? Start doing more things for the purpose of fun and enjoyment, rather than because “you’re good at it”.
Maybe that’s dance or baking — even if you aren’t “the best”, does it make you happy while you’re doing it? Yes? Boom! Then do more of that! Life is too short to only do things that you’re “good at”.
I love this quote: “Be brave enough to be bad at something new.” - Jon Acuff
Getting creative, feeling joyful.
8. This one’s for the adults out there!
I’d also like to recommend a book for all parents/guardians/coaches who work with young people (specifically girls): Enough As She Is, by Rachel Simmons.
This self-care and good mental health learning process shouldn’t just all be on the girls; we need adults and society to recognise the pressures they are putting on our youth. I’d also highly recommend this book for adults who want to work on recognising some burdensome thoughts/patterns that they might be putting on themselves.
We hope you find these helpful — right now, or even way in the future. If there are any methods and tips that really work for you, we’d love to hear about them, and celebrate the positive change they’ve made for you!
Hugs & high fives,
The Project Fearless team
Written by Project Fearless copywriter, Abi Malins.